History's Minds
by TheLiteratureLieutenant
Summary: Have you ever wanted to know what some of history's greatest may be thinking in their best moments? Now you can (sort of) with History's Minds. If you have a person and scenario that you would love to see, proceed to enter it as a review.
1. Max and Mutton

Somewhere deep in the jungles of the Congo lies a hill in a clearing. This hill was home to a cave inhabited by two rather inane and primitive human beings. Every morning, they both parted their ways to gather from the rich fig trees, learning from the likes of their close ancestors. As they climbed to the top of the trees everyday to harvest the delicious fruit, they either paid no attention to the expansive canopy that is home to so many different primates and birds, or they had not the mental capacity to understand its beauty.

One day, as they arrived back long before sunset with a week's rations, their boredom got the best of them, and they shared a short conversation of grunts. Their understanding is that of their own language, unknown to any other person in the world. They parted ways again and scoured the jungle for fallen trees that may have logs broken from the main trunk. When they arrived back, the both of them had plenty of logs and sticks.

As they decided what to do with the wood, the first caveman (We'll call him Max for lack of confusion) grunts his unintelligible idea to the latter caveman (We'll call him Mutton,) and arranges a circle of stones received from the cave not far away. He then took the logs and clumsily arranged them to form a crude pile. He stood up and looked at his masterpiece.

"That. That is good," Max's Joy said, his body language proud and fulfilled, as if he just won the gold medal in the Olympics that don't exist. He proceeded to prod a set of stony buttons on the console, not entirely sure of what they do.

"Yes. Much good," Max's Anger replied, his voice a deep growl, as if he were a jaguar and his dinner was but 10 feet in front of him. He too pushed a button in appreciation of Max's work.

As the two men pondered what they may do with this pile, rain began to fall from the sky, the warm wet drops hitting the two on their heads and shoulders. The cavemen have grown accustomed to this rain and surprisingly enjoy the warm feeling that comes with the strange river of the sky. However, rain turned to storm and the two had no time to react before a flash of light nearly hit the both of them. They jumped back in shock, their reflexes doing no justice in saving them; they surely would've been dead if the lightning were to hit them.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH," Mutton's Fear yelled in terror, his body covering as many buttons as possible for the frail stick of an emotion.

In Max's head, a near identical Fear reacted in an identical way. Annoyed, Max's Anger grabbed Fear by the collar of his fur coat and yanks him off, proceeding to throw him at the wooden wall opposite the Mind's Eye.

"Ugh. Anger!" Fear yelled, his vocabulary limiting his incredibly annoyed rebuttal. As a result, Anger merely shrugged.

Max, the first to rise after the impact, looked curiously at the orange and red creature that seemed to be forming around and inside the pile of logs he had so expertly placed.

"HEY! NO TOUCH!" Anger yelled, furious at the strange creature for messing with his creation.

Max ran, enraged, at the pile of logs, hoping to catch the creature and experiment with its meat. However, upon touching the creature, Max felt a sudden burst of pain and yelped in agony, backing away from the pile of logs.

"OUCHOUCHOUCHOUCH!" Anger continued to exclaim, feeling the awful sensation in Max's right hand.

Mutton, having watched the whole encounter, laughed at Max's attempt to catch the weird animal. Max, having felt too much pain to ignore this, yelled fabricated swears at Mutton until he was quieted. Upon recovering slightly from the pain, Max kneeled close to the creature that rested upon the pile of logs. He dared not touch it, but upon close examination, the creature emanated a strange feeling. It crept under Max's skin and traveled up his arms until his whole body felt the odd sensation.

"Ooooooooooh. I likeeeeee," Joy said, slurring on the edge of a moan. He relaxed and nearly fell to the floor but caught himself and simply stood, relishing in the wonderful feeling. He pressed a few buttons, urging Max to call for Mutton to join.

Max after what seemed like a pleasant eternity in heaven, called for Mutton to join him. However, Mutton stood defiantly and grunted a simple refusal.

"Ugh. Mutton," Joy and Anger collectively groaned at said caveman's reluctance. Anger proceeded to slam a few buttons in annoyance.

Max stood up, and, with more command, urged Mutton to feel the creatures wonderful sensation. Mutton however still refused.

"Mutton!" Anger shouted, slamming a few more buttons.

Max shouted gibberish at Mutton for a straight minute before Mutton growled and picked up a giant rock near the cave's entrance. Max was cornered between the dangerous creature and Mutton.

"Wait!" Joy said, an idea forming in his head. He looked at the bowl of ideas and rushed to it, being sure to grab the right one, the commonplace bulb actually being a sun-shaped sphere. He sticks the idea into Max's console with haste, and is relieved when the idea is accepted.

Max, a sudden epiphany upon him, reaches backwards and grabs one of the smaller logs. As he expected, the creature split between the log and the rest of the pile. Max pointed the log, creature intact, towards Mutton. Mutton responds sensibly enough, dropping the rock and running away.

The four emotions in Headquarters exclaimed their primitive jubilation. However, Joy, the most curious of the emotions, stares at the log in their hands. Almost miraculously, Joy's thought cranked tenfold their usual speed. ' _The creature isn't moving from the log,_ ' Joy thought, perplexed, ' _It isn't scared of Max and Mutton. All creatures are scare of Max and Mutton. That means that this isn't a creature. What is it?_ ' Joy stared, puzzled, at the... that... **thing** that lay on the end of Max's log, whilst the other three emotions, Sadness, Anger, and Fear continued to celebrate. The others eventually quieted down and looked at Joy, confused as to why he wasn't celebrating as well.

"What IS it?" Joy asked himself, not expecting an answer from any of the others. As expected, the other three of his... his... ' _Wait, what even are_ they _? What am I?'_ Nevertheless, the others simply shrugged at his inquiry.

"Wait," Joy said, more and more questions piling up in his head. Unbeknownst to him, his brain was growing more and more complex; what took man thousands of years is taking him 5 minutes. He walked with purpose towards the idea bowl and inspected the contents.

' _Big rock pile? No, no, no. Big stick pile? What is with Max's love for big piles? Aha! Here it is!"_ Joy exclaimed mentally, growing more and more excited with each step he takes toward the console, idea in hand. Upon entering it in, a smile grows on Joy's face when the idea is accepted.

Max, sitting confused and watching the strange thing rest on the log, suddenly came to a clear conclusion. He stood up excitedly and opened his lungs for the rest of the world hear his news:

"FIRE! FIIIIIIIIIIRRRREEEEEEEEEEE!" While Max wasn't sure what fire was, he now had a name for it, and that was good enough for him. Max spent the rest of the day exclaiming his discovery and dancing around, only stopping when the sun fell and his throat grew sore. Upon entering the cave, he was met with the familiar cold and darkness that was typical with night.

"Ugh. Hate cold. Hate dark," Anger remarks, his complaint more of an acceptance of the truth. Joy, however had other ideas.

"Not for long, Anger. Not for long."

LINE

 **Hey guys. As you noticed, this story was a little more well-written than the previous one. That's because one was written in the middle of the night on a Tuesday, and one was written in the middle of the night on a Friday (including caffeinated beverages.) Anyway, if you want a certain scenario or person for me to do, you can leave that in the review section or PM it to me. The only rule I have is to stray away from sexual content. I'll look at the Crusade through the eyes of a soldier, but I won't dare step in Cleopatra's bedroom while Julius Caesar is in there. That's pretty much it. Expect these chapters to come on their own time, when they are truly completed and I'm satisfied with their content. Last week's story seems like child's play now, so expect quality to increase exponentially. If you want me to return to a certain character (say, figure out what Max does next,) I will happily, because I like writing out the stories for several different characters. Also, keep in mind that the chapters will be put in chronological order of history, not of upload date, so as to provide the "sifting through history's minds from the start" feeling. Anywho, that's the extent of this gigantic author's not. Thanks for reading, and if you like what I write, check out my other works, because they're pretty cool too, I guess.**


	2. Abraham Lincoln

It was a wonderful night outside of Ford Theater. An enticing show was taking place featuring some of the greatest actors the United States of America has ever known. The theater was lit warmly with expensive candles housed in chandeliers, and the atmosphere was light; to say the crowd was roaring with laughter was an understatement. Under the cover of hysterical laughter, a gunshot could faintly be heard towards the president's booth.

"Well, this is a strange predicament," Joy said as he stared calmly at the blank screen of headquarters.

"OH GOD, WE'RE DEAD!" Fear screamed, terrified. His screams were silenced when an aggravated Anger smacked him across the back of the head.

"We're not dead, you half-wit! We're only dying, albeit that isn't the best of circumstances either," Anger said, his annoyance turning to pensive thought as he unintentionally digressed slightly.

As the two argued, Joy could only keep his eyes on the blank screen. He was numb with shock. His wonderful wife (hell, pretty much his entire cabinet) had advised strongly against coming tonight, but he persisted despite this. This was all his fault.

Meanwhile, among Anger and Fear's bickering, Disgust and Sadness collectively stared at the disaster transpiring on the outside of Headquarter's marble walls. The hole in Long Term memory was worrying enough if not for the fact that it seemed to spread rapidly. Very soon, the Dream Productions building would succumb to the newfound abyss.

As aforementioned building collapsed into aforementioned abyss, Sadness, unable to process the idea of death, fell forward on his face and waited. Disgust stood still, petrified by the debacle happening on the outside of Headquarters. He finally unfreezes after what seems like an eternity as his knees buckle and he crumples in a heap on the floor, unable to process his impending doom.

"I'd never! How _**dare**_ you insult me in such a way?!" Fear shouted, his heated discussion with Anger showing no end.

"I dare to insult with confidence that your brittle spine would do little to stop me!"

"Brittle?! I'll have you know I've brought the tact and strategy of a god, and in battle, I could very well be the best damn rifleman you ever laid your eyes upon!"

"You believe wholly that _your_ 'strategy' is actually plausible? Your decisions are so cautious and senseless that-"

And with that, Headquarters was devoured by the ominous black pit, and little more did Abraham Lincoln breathe before he breathed his final breath.


	3. Review and Reply Archive

History's Minds Review and Reply Archive

Dancingwiththesocks says:

"Ok this was different, shall it be continued?"

I reply:

Surely, especially if this is received well and I get a slew of scenarios to work with via the review section.

* * *

Korrasami 88 says:

"Does biblical history count?"

I reply:

Any history counts. Though, if you recommend an obscure character, it may take more time to come around.

* * *

falconer54 says:

"Some ideas:

Truman dropping the bomb

Leonidas at Thermopaylae

Alexander the Great (not sure when, though)

[Julius?] Caesar crossing the Rubicon and being assassinated

Shakespeare writing a play

Washington crossing the Delaware

King John signing the Magna Carta

Marie Antoinette being killed

JFK and the Cuban Missile Crisis

Watson and Crick discovering DNA

Michelangelo sculpting David

Paul Revere on his ride

John Hancock signing the Declaration of Independance"

I reply:

Holy crap, these are some good ideas! I'm gonna have to be a little creative with some of them (ex. JFK and the Cuban Missile Crisis or Truman dropping the bomb,) but these are all wonderful ideas. All of these are going straight to the idea vault with the others.


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